For every adversity there is a blessing. Just like quitting the 3Cs. It's not easy to be steadfast with what we set to do. I still feel like contacting Els but I know it is a worthless effort.
So this is back to breaking an addiction. Els is nothing more than a strong addiction like cigarette and cannabis.
I think the issue here is I over romanticize my relationship with Els. In reality, there is nothing.
So time to dismantle the illusion and live a normal life.
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Certainly I have too much time on my hand.
I am trying my best to maintain sanity here.
What I did is I switch to Flyfm.
I got to break the addiction no matter what.
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